Have I Been Here Too Long

Have I Been Here Too Long ?

 

Compliments and smiles are all I can muster,

as I climb the solitary stairwell of loneliness,

to where a lost soul reaches its peak,

and I enter my attic of thoughts.

 

My attention turns to sinking sands of laughter,

draining the positives of happiness,

replacing them with memories of sadness,

leaving a world I can no longer touch.

 

As tears roll down the inside of my heart,

they erase any joy I once had.

Cool pains trace to the pit of my stomach,

where I cry into myself.

 

Self indulgence in one’s ride to oblivion,

and the lonely rise to an end makes reminiscing easy,

any regrets are a never-ending torment,

of what might have been.

 

Where is the exit ?

the only way out is to close soft eyes and say farewell,

as the torturous eulogy of my experience,

is as painful as being here.

 

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©Nick Hawkins 2004, all poetry rights reserved

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